A controversial article on Facebook. A particularly sassy video on Youtube. An opinionated text post on Tumblr. We’ve all been guilty of watching the arguments go down and the shade get thrown. This is a quick starter guide to the types of commenters on the internet.

The White Knight

Have you ever seen that guy who’s just a little to defensive? The guy who panders to the “helpless” in hopes of gaining social acceptance? Most of the time, this is a guy who will defend an attractive girl against other commenters, arguing her point for her and often times speaking over her. At least, until he finds out she has a boyfriend or she turns him down. These guys are looking for one thing and one thing alone… And they definitely come off as more than a little desperate for human interaction.

The Devil’s Advocate

 

The Troll

 

The Logician

The Original Poster

The one person who always gets forgotten is the original poster of the feed. While sometimes they may be doing it in order to get the attention and drama going, aka a troll, most of the time the post was fairly innocent. Too bad the internet isn’t so forgiving. These posters are cursed to either endure the notifications, the guilt by association and the decision to delete their entire post from the internet. If they delete, they’re getting rid of the shade and making everyone sad. If they don’t, their crap is online forever. Bottom line: It sucks to be the OP.

The Lazy Commenter

Have you ever been scrolling along a comment feed and read a comment that made you realize how off track you’ve gotten from the original post? Like a discussion started about a movie, then the actors in it, then something in the news related to the actor and then… “Can’t wait to see this with my daughter!”. This commenters don’t bother to read the comments left beforehand and probably won’t look again. While these comments can be annoying, they can make you realize that you were supposed to get off facebook two hours ago before getting into this (incredibly public) conversation.

The Popcorn Muncher

Admit it. This is you. This is all of us. Those people who love to watch these arguments go down. Whether on Facebook, Youtube, 4Chan, Reddit or Tumblr, these people live to watch the drama. It’s bound to happen anyway, right? Total strangers with vastly different opinions meeting in a controversial setting is just begging for some good old fashioned arguments. The internet is better than television! When you see a good post getting tons of comments, you know to sit back with your snacks and read on, reloading and subscribing so you get every moment of dramatic goodness.

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Written by madisongarland

Hi! I'm Madi, a college-student studying Communications and Elementary Education. I strive to deconstruct, study and suggest improvements for media aimed towards the most impressionable audiences. I've always loved cartoons and children's programming. Come follow me and help children everywhere!

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